Understanding the Stages of Grief: What You Need to Know

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Grief is a deeply personal experience, yet many people find comfort in understanding the common patterns that often accompany loss. The concept of “stages of grief” was first introduced by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, and while not everyone experiences these stages in the same way or order, they can provide a helpful framework for navigating bereavement.

The five stages of grief are:

1. Denial
   This is often the first reaction to loss. Denial acts as a protective mechanism, helping you process overwhelming emotions gradually. You might find yourself thinking, “This can’t be happening.”
    
2. Anger
   As reality sets in, feelings of frustration or anger may surface. This anger can be directed at yourself, others, or even the situation. It’s a natural part of healing.
    
3. Bargaining
   During this stage, you may dwell on “what if” or “if only” thoughts, hoping to reverse or change the outcome. Bargaining often reflects a desire to regain control.
    
4. Depression
   Profound sadness is common as the permanence of loss becomes clear. This stage can feel heavy, but it’s an important part of processing grief.
    
5. Acceptance
   Acceptance doesn’t mean you’re “over” the loss. It means you’ve found a way to live with it. You begin to adjust and move forward while still honouring your loved one.

Not necessarily. Grief is not linear. You might move back and forth between stages or experience some more intensely than others. Everyone’s journey is unique.

There’s no set timeline. Some people move through stages quickly, while others take months or years. It’s important to give yourself permission to grieve at your own pace.

• Talk to someone you trust – Friends, family, or a counsellor can provide support.
• Join a bereavement group – Sharing with others who understand can be healing.
• Practice self-care – Rest, eat well, and allow yourself time to heal.
• Seek professional help – If grief feels overwhelming, a therapist can help.

If you’re looking for grief counselling or bereavement support groups in South East London, we’ve compiled resources to help you.